Online guide tips for ex spouse and family for gatherings
Family dynamics can be difficult when you’re married, but after a divorce, they can become even more complicated. Not all marriages end in a bitter battle, however, even in the best of circumstances having an ex-spouse attend family functions can cause discomfort.
The main priority is to deal with the kids and make sure they are comfortable with their parent attending the gathering. Once you have met with approval, have a discussion with your ex-spouse to set boundaries. It is important to always be respectful of your ex-spouse in the presence of your children.
Before you decide to invite your ex-spouse to a family gathering is it also important to talk to extended family members. If there is still grief from the divorce, it needs to be set aside and not dealt with at the family function.
Kids are very perceptive and if they feel like someone is being mean to their parent, it can be very upsetting and cause feelings of insecurity. There are many events that will require both parents being in attendance so it is vital to find a way to get along amicably in family settings.
If you are unable to reach a consensus on how to behave in family settings without upsetting the kids, you might consider meet with a family counselor or pastor to resolve your issues so they don’t impact the kids.
It may also be helpful to read some books specifically dealing with divorce and recovery. Oftentimes conflict is rooted in feelings that have not been mended.
Remember you only control your behavior and feelings. Behave in a responsible manner in from of your children. Continue to model healthy behavior in front of your kids even if conflict arises then follow up and talk it through at a more appropriate time.
It may be necessary to vent your frustration to a friend, however, never make those frustrations known to your kids. Seek good advice and address each difficulty with your ex-spouse on a case by case basis. Stick to the topic and don’t attack his character.
If you continue to interact with your ex-spouse in a healthy manner, always being respectful of boundaries you have set and keeping the kids at the forefront of your relationship, eventually you will be able to find balance in family gatherings. Relationships are difficult, but with hard work and an open heart, difficulties can be worked through with a positive